getting out of the band

dickdog · Post by **dickdog** » Fri Feb 22, 2008 9:54 pm

I got my cocktail set about a year ago. I have now started jamming with a new band, after getting use to playing a cocktail set.. My problem is telling the band I have been playing with for 4 years that I am leaving. I want to leave on good terms, but I know how the leader of the band is, and i don't think he will like it if I tell him I am leaving. I have never had to do this before. Every other time it has been some kind of fight and the band has broken up, or you just tell them to f -off, and quit. HELP ME?????????????

bykrmyk · Post by **bykrmyk** » Mon Feb 25, 2008 4:38 pm

You can't do much to control the band leader's reaction. Maybe the best you can hope for is that the other members will stay on good terms especially if the leader is unreasonable.

I'd just say that you are moving on. Want to do something different. It might help if you had some replacements to recommend. Drummers you know of who might be able to take your place. That would ease their transition and show you don't want to burn any bridges.

Good luck. Change usually comes at some cost.

Dinkus · Post by **Dinkus** » Tue Feb 26, 2008 10:18 pm

If the band doesn't do much work, you could possibly juggle the 2 gigs. If not, well usually there are band members that you can confide in about wanting a change, they can help making the leader understand if needed. Then approach the leader. If the leader does decide to flip out, stay cool and thank him for the last 4 years. Don't be a prick. This is a really small circle and odds are you will cross paths again. In time he may even call you back for a gig or 2 to fill in when their new drummer has a problem and can't make the gig. I've fired several guys and in time have worked with again, we've all remained friends and can call on one another. People have also left (burn out, time for change, school) and we had kept an open door policy. This allowed our band to keep working during times of sickness, pregnancy, family grief by calling on old players to fill in. Be professional and give proper notice even if the guy is an ass. It's only your reputation your wrecking by doing it any other way.

Dinkus

matthew medeiros · Post by **matthew medeiros** » Tue Feb 26, 2008 10:28 pm

dickdog wrote:I got my cocktail set about a year ago. I have now started jamming with a new band, after getting use to playing a cocktail set.. My problem is telling the band I have been playing with for 4 years that I am leaving. I want to leave on good terms, but I know how the leader of the band is, and i don't think he will like it if I tell him I am leaving. I have never had to do this before. Every other time it has been some kind of fight and the band has broken up, or you just tell them to f -off, and quit. HELP ME?????????????

you could bang the bandleaders wife/girlfriend, that usually does the trick!, no pun intended!

cocktaildrum.com